Lazy or Self-Love? How A Trauma Therapist in Atlanta Helps You Master the Art of Self-Care
In a fast-paced world where productivity seems to define worth, the concept of rest has become a bit of a mystery. Is taking a day off to binge-watch your favorite show an act of self-love or just, well… lazy? For many of us, especially those carrying the weight of unresolved trauma, this question can trigger a whirlwind of self-doubt and guilt. Yet, as a therapist in Atlanta, I often emphasize, that finding balance between rest and action is essential for our mental and emotional well-being.
In this post, we’ll explore how trauma therapy can help redefine what it means to relax with purpose, to "love yourself" without a side of guilt, and to master that elusive art of balanced self-care. This isn’t just about giving yourself permission to rest but understanding why it’s so vital for healing.
The Productivity Trap: Why Are We So Hard on Ourselves?
The productivity culture has woven its way into every corner of our lives, creating a “go, go, go” mentality that leaves little room for rest. For anyone trying to recover from trauma, this emphasis on relentless action can create an inner conflict. Trauma impacts our capacity for self-compassion, often leading to thoughts like, “I should be doing more” or “Resting makes me lazy.”
Here in Atlanta, trauma therapists regularly encounter people who feel like they have to earn their rest. But the reality is, rest isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity. Our bodies and minds need downtime to recharge, especially when healing from emotional wounds. A balanced approach, where we can take time for ourselves without labeling it as laziness, is not only possible; it’s essential.
Lazy vs. Self-Care: What’s the Real Difference?
When we feel guilt over taking time to rest, it’s often because we’ve internalized the idea that rest equals laziness. But let’s be clear: lazy is about avoiding necessary responsibilities, while self-care is about attending to your well-being. Trauma therapy in Atlanta often focuses on helping people distinguish between these two concepts and recognize that rest is a form of care, not avoidance.
Think of it this way—self-care is what recharges you, filling your energy reserves so you can meet life’s demands with resilience. Laziness, on the other hand, tends to drain you, often leaving you feeling unfulfilled. Recognizing this difference can shift your perspective, allowing you to honor your needs without shame.
How Trauma Affects Our Relationship with Rest
People who’ve experienced trauma often struggle with their sense of self-worth and feel immense pressure to be "productive" to validate their value. Trauma can also put our nervous systems on high alert, making relaxation feel unfamiliar or even uncomfortable. As Atlanta trauma therapists explain, this hypervigilance is the body’s way of keeping us safe, even if it no longer serves us.
Trauma therapy works to reframe our relationship with relaxation, helping us understand that it’s okay—and safe—to take breaks. Through practices like mindfulness and somatic awareness, therapists help individuals reconnect with their bodies, learning how to identify what they need in the moment. This reconnection isn’t just about physical rest but learning how to rest emotionally, too.
Signs You’re in Need of Some Balanced Self-Care
Recognizing when you need rest can be a challenge, especially if you’re used to pushing yourself. Here are some common signs that I recommend watching out for:
You’re constantly exhausted, even after a full night’s sleep. Fatigue that doesn’t improve with sleep can be a sign that you need emotional rest.
You feel irritable or overwhelmed by minor things. Emotional burnout can make us more reactive and less able to cope.
You’re avoiding social interactions or feeling disconnected from people. Emotional exhaustion often leads to isolation as we try to conserve energy.
You’re struggling to focus or stay engaged with tasks. A lack of focus can signal that your mind needs a break.
These are not signs of laziness. They’re your body’s way of asking for rest and restoration.
Trauma Therapy’s Role in Reclaiming Rest
A trauma therapist doesn’t just help you process past events—they also work with you to establish healthier patterns of self-care, including rest. In trauma therapy, you can explore how past experiences have shaped your beliefs around work, productivity, and self-worth. This deeper understanding can reveal why taking a day to rest feels more like a luxury than a necessity.
Trauma therapy often incorporates restorative relaxation techniques without being overwhelming. You might be introduced to practices such as:
Mindfulness Meditation: Learning to be present with your thoughts and sensations without judgment.
Body Scanning and Somatic Practices: Becoming attuned to your physical state to recognize when you’re tense, tired, or in need of rest.
Compassionate Self-Inquiry: Challenging the internalized belief that resting equals laziness and replacing it with affirming self-compassionate thoughts.
Hot penning: Permitting ourselves to release negative and sometimes emotions that may be holding us back.
These practices are not only grounding but empowering. By integrating self-care into your routine, you’re taking control of your well-being and challenging the notion that productivity is the only path to self-worth.
Embracing Balanced Self-Care: Practical Tips
So, how do you bring balanced self-care into your everyday life? Here are a few practical tips to help you get started:
Start Small: Begin with a few minutes of intentional rest daily, like a quiet tea break, a short walk, or five minutes of deep breathing. This can help train your mind and body to see rest as an integral part of your routine.
Set Boundaries with Technology: Constant notifications and the pull of social media can be draining. Try setting specific times to check your phone, and spend the rest of the time engaging in restful, non-digital activities.
Practice Self-Compassion: When guilt over resting creeps in, remind yourself that you’re recharging, not wasting time. Self-care isn’t selfish—it’s essential for your health.
Find Your Version of Relaxation: What brings you joy and peace? Maybe it’s reading, gardening, cooking, or even dancing. Balanced self-care doesn’t have to look the same for everyone, so find what works best for you.
Check-in with a Trauma Therapist: If you’re finding it difficult to balance self-care and productivity, consulting with a trauma therapist in Atlanta can be invaluable. They’ll help you explore what’s underlying these patterns and guide you toward a more supportive mindset.
Reclaiming Rest as a Form of Self-Love
Embracing balanced self-care is a journey—one that invites you to release guilt, challenge old narratives, and celebrate the time you give yourself. Working with a trauma therapist in Atlanta can provide the support and insights needed to make self-care an ongoing, guilt-free part of your life.
Remember, self-care is a way to nourish your mind, body, and soul, making you stronger and more resilient. So next time you feel the urge to label yourself as lazy for needing a break, take a breath, remind yourself of all the good rest brings, and embrace the art of balanced self-care.
If you want to develop a deeper sense of self-love and self-compassion, reach out! I would be happy to hear about what you’re struggling with and share with you how I can help.
Kristy Brewer is an online therapist in Georgia who helps people find peace amidst the chaos. Her specialties include trauma therapy in Atlanta, toxic relationships, anxiety therapy, depression therapy, and parents raising a traumatized child.
You can request a free 15-minute phone consultation by clicking here.
